Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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