Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
