She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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