found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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