I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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