talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
