there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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