She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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