stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
