Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
