i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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