I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
