So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Randomize
