I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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