Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
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