remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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