So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize