They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
God, I missed his penis.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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