if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize