I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
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