I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
