Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
