He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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