when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
wanna go halves on a baby?
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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