What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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