Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
