Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
