He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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