Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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