Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
send nudes
from the living room?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
