Only a mothe r could love this liver
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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