He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
