he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
