Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(602): View more from Arizona

You can't motorboat a personality

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(404): View more from Georgia

last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl

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(419): View more from Ohio

Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.

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(225): View more from Louisiana

I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.

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Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
Read it at the TFLN blog
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate

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(323): View more from California

Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me

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(415): View more from California

Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends

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(850): View more from Florida

I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?

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(703): View more from Virginia

As a home can we vote to stab Peter?

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