dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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