i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Randomize
