You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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