It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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