Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
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I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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