We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
