Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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