i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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