Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
