Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
