Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
