you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
