What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
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