All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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