we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
The Olympian is in my bed
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize