I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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