I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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